Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Madamoiselle: The Resolutions that Burns.

It's the 9th day of 2008. To be frank, the 9 days of new year didn't give me a good impression to start a new life ahead. I'm not trying to be a pessimist, my resolution itself is to be more optimistic about anything.

Remember my resolutions? I don't normally make any resolutions. This year, however, I made it optional, mostly for work. I wanted to change to a new leaf. Procrastinating was not me. But I became one few months back. Was it because of demotivation of work or lost in my own world? Both actually. That's why I took a long holiday and wanted a good start ahead in 2008. My first day of work were surprised with a huge change and hectic work schedule coming ahead. Dealing with changes with work was ok for me, I can still bear it and are willing to see the good side of it. But dealing with people that you know you can't get along was definitely a big challenge. They are back! And I have to face them.

I am not mean. I don't hate people easily. I don't shut people from my life for no reason and block anyone who made mistakes without giving any 2nd chances. I am a happy person, the one who always laughs, the one who jokes with her friends and makes silly remarks and teases to pass the time. But I normally do those things when I'm with someone I'm comfortable with, the ones I do get along well. Most, thought I could never be an angry person. They say, I was hardly serious.

Honestly, a friend had quoted this "Harmless unless Provoked!" and for sure, I am as he quoted! I will not hate you if you don't make me. I usually like to distant myself from people who tried to ruin my life. I just don't like being angry or pissed all the time so my solution was to avoid. The problem is, sometimes I had no choice. They come and provoke. They liked being hated. They just are too thick skinned to even cared that they are not wanted. A pain I have to deal with. And it ruined part of my resolutions.

Speaking of which, let me rephrase again my resolutions:

1) Always be optimistic
They ruined it. I'm still trying though.
2) Ignore bad vibes @ people who tends to ruin ur lifes and those who underestimates you.
The devils are back, killing my ignorance.
3) Clearing my Debts--> a never ending story..esp. my cards..waaa!!!
Still in progress
4) Self control --> in spending especially..hehehe
So far, 2% success hahaha...
5) Needs more determination and stop procrastinating :p
I am chanting I can do this..i can do this...
6) Anger management, out of stress... 2007 had been a good one...need more in 2008 :)
2008 became my biggest challenge for this. The devils provoked too much.
7) Loose weight--> I really need to make it work someday hahaha...
No comment in this yet ..teehee!

Today, is the New Year for Islam. Selamat Tahun Baru Hijriah 1429 Everyone. I hope this New Year starts the marking of a better days ahead and these whole 9 days that passed was just a nightmare. I pray for those who hurts the people around, intentionally or not, will change and opened their hearts to be more sincere with everything they do, talk and hear. I pray for myself to be more patient with the challenges given ahead and faced my inner cries calmly.

"Taqabbala Allahu minna wa minkum."
"May Allah accept from us, and from you."

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